Shall we dance?

Posted in How to, Other genres


It is an ordeal. Ideally, you should never encounter a situation where you have to “ask” a woman for a dance. It is best to try any of the alternatives given below before giving other sense to the words “Would you dance with me?”

You can use the method Mr Smooth to start dancing with a group of girls. Or you can be on the dance floor while dancing with a girl or group. Or you can stop on the dance floor and pull any girl that walks by. Or you can act like you already know the girl, take her hand, take her on the dance floor and say “well, come on”. If she seems reluctant, say to her “oh, come on!” If she says “I’m tired”, BOOM, you’re in a conversation (you did not even realize it). “Tired? Well, since you said so, this place is a bit crowded / noisy. Why not go to a quiet place where we can talk and relax?” If you drop her from your hands, catch her again and take her in the most beautiful and quiet corner that you checked in advance.

Or – you can use the old method to invite a girl to dance. If she say yes, very well! If she refuses, you’re out of luck. You can try to save the situation by joining in a conversation but if she already turned you down- probably a comeback would be too much. Or – you can move to the next girl, but remember – if the rest of the girls already saw that you was refused, your chances to dance with a girl diminishes. This would result in the possibility to move from girl to girl asking for a dance, and each one of them to turn their back to you, until you are out of girls. Okay, the last part is the worst, yet to assume that someone will eventually dance with you, but surely that someone will be … (you guessed it) a UG (ugly girl).

Ideal the refusal should not be, because if you ever talked to her on a deeper level, the girl would be anxiously waiting to be with you on the dance floor. But considering the circumstances in a nightclub (deafening sound, flickering light spots), this can be difficult. So she evaluates you as “at first sight”, so it will be YES or NO.


But if you’ll not be able to build a solid relation and you will not make her to long for you, surely you don’t have too many options – perhaps you’ll thank her after a dance, maybe ask “can we dance later?” (Yeah right) or you can ask: “do you mind if I join you in conversation?” Noooo, these all are so expired, it is best to go to the next girl you see.

Theoretically, you have some chance if she sees you with another girl smart enough to agree to dance with you and having the time of her life. But whatever you do, do not sit on her head and arguing with her and trying to find out why she doesn’t want to dance with you. Forget about her, move on, there is a smarter and more attractive girl (who can appreciate an invitation) right behind her, and you’re the one who waited all her life or at least this evening.

Whatever you decide, remember that on the other side, the situation is also tense: girls are coming in clubs to dance or better said – to be asked to dance and they are nervous as you are thinking – “I wish this guy invites me to dance”after a while: “I wish any guy invites me to dance”later, while she is burning to dance: “I wish anyone ask me to dance!”

So go for it! Be YOU that guy! .

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    1 Comment

  1. Geez! Asking someone else to dance is terrifying! I would only hope that the person I was thinking of asking is someone that has a common friend in our group. That might make things a little easier.

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